The Struggle Of Dating With HSV


Once people find out they have HSV, they often feel like the dating game is over for them. This is a very common initial reaction, and very few people realize just how inaccurate it is.

When you find out you have HSV, you are overwhelmed with emotions, and we all know emotions have their way of making people go crazy at times. This certainly does not mean they are correct.

Once a person gets educated on herpes, the initial stress starts fading and it’s much easier to accept the actual reality of the situation, which is: you have a virus. It is mostly harmless. It is not life threatening in any way, and most of the time, it shows no symptoms. On top of it all, the majority of the human race also has that same virus. In this world of ours, there are more HSV + than HSV- people. Genital herpes is so common; it affects around 20% of the adult US population. So, how exactly is your dating life over? It isn’t, it really isn’t.

Talking about herpes with your date

The first date after a HSV diagnosis often feels strange. You might feel like you’re keeping a secret from your date, in case he doesn’t know about your diagnosis. It is completely up to you to decide when the right time for telling your date about HSV is. The best possible situation is dating someone who already knows all about it, and who isn’t held back by the stigma that flows around HSV. If you date a person who is educated, a person who knows how to take all the necessary precaution, it is most likely you won’t have any problems at all.


No matter if they have HSV or not, everyone who goes on dates should be prepared for rejection. Of course, being positive is the key of a successful relationship start, but this doesn’t mean you should get depressed in case you get rejected. You may have to face a hasty retreat once the person you are seeing finds out about HSV. If this happens, you should know one thing: anyone who tries to humiliate you because you have herpes is not a person who is worth your while. You should not let this discourage you.

What to do?

Keep dating, and have faith that you will run into someone who still wants to be with you, regardless of your diagnosis. There are many people out there who won’t mind cutting back on the things that could transmit the virus. After all, it only takes a little education to understand that having HSV does not ban a person from having a completely fulfilling sexual life, or giving pleasure to his partner.

Although it may seem really challenging to find a perfect date for someone who is HSV+, if you join the right community, you won’t even have to worry about your diagnosis. Dating a person who also has the condition will ease things by a lot. They already know what you’ve been through, and they know that having herpes won’t affect your love or sex life in any particular way. In addition, you will have much more in common, and many things to talk about, compared to dating people who are completely ignorant when it comes to HSV, and this alone is a huge plus.